Patterns of Life

I have for the past two weeks decided I needed to do some adjusting in multiple areas concerning my patterns in living.  I find it strange and yet humorous how we get set in patterns in our lives that are not working and are causing us stress but we continue on living the same patterns.  You would think; one, we would at least change just because they are not working or two, we’d notice when we doing these patterns we are stressed.  And what do we do; just keep trucking along as though perhaps today will be different or we will have the power to define the odds and it will work today.  Our hopes are our super-powers will kick-in and overcome for after all aren’t we the ones who are in control of our lives.  I consider myself a person who feels and sees herself creating this awesome life.  So what happen?  Well with one thought I am doing the same thing I have been doing…forever? And then I keep asking myself, why is this not working?

And this is where the humorous part of this comes into play.  Yes, I am the one who creates and sculptures my life.  I am also the one who must realize when creating my life I must be versatile in achieving it.  Where does it say it was going to be a magic carpet ride to fulfill your passion and/or purpose in life?  And when did I begin to believe everyone else in the world was going to jump through loops to make sure I would accomplish my dreams?  Life definitely is funny because we make that way.  We seem to strive to be unsuccessful more than waking-up to the reality of life.  What did not work in the past more likely will not work in the present?  And as far as the future…oh it is out there and we hold on to it wishing for the miracle but we want someone else to create it for us.  I cannot change the past and I do not know what the future brings…the present is the only moment I have control over.  And with this said my moments are not so bad. 

This past weekend became my time of altering my patterns.  I acknowledge it will be uncomfortable and a slow process for me.  The advantage of patterns even though they do not work and cause stress they are familiar to us, they become our “norm” in life, it would be like not being able to brush your teeth in the morning.  I know my patterns are destructive for me, I feel as though I am like a hamster running in circles and ending up in the same place I start, which is nowhere.  And I also know though there will be moments of me missing my patterns.  I have already began my journey and found there are those who have responded to my change in a negative manner, but then there are those who have responded with great understanding and remain my friends.  I would say I am making process in changing my patterns.